Yesterday, I got a call from my best buddy Lem. He asked if he could visit my mom with me the next time I go? “Hmm, that is a funny question,” I thought. “Well sure but why?” “Well, I want to experience her with you there. I want to understand the love and the relationship you have. I want to understand the chemistry the two of you have.”
Here is a friend who loves and cares for me. He sees me hurting with my mom’s condition and just wants to help experience it with me, to help me in some way. This seems to me to be one of the most generous gifts and compliments that a friend can give another friend. To be with them and understand the depth of the relationship and love that you have for a parent; this is special kind of understanding.
So for those of you that don’t know what to do for your friend who is struggling with a love one about to leave the planet, just be with them. This is emotional intelligence at the highest level.
One Comment
Wow, Dwayne. It's so amazing that you're sharing this journey with us. So many people our age are having similar experiences with our parents. My beau's mother just passed away earlier this week after a (seemlingly short) struggle with complications from carcinoid tumors resulting in CHF.
We were so lucky that all of her family were near enough to spend her last few days with her and each other. The support of our extended family and friends has meant everything in being able to get through this difficult time.
Your advice to friends is right on target–just be with them. Our thoughts are with you and your family.